Gratitude • 感恩

Hello, my name is Halden Levin, and you are listening to Little Dragon’s Journey. 你好！我叫李靜辰，你正在聽小龍的旅程。

Transition Music（音樂）

It was all very sudden. On Tuesday of last week, we were informed that our Chinese classes would switch to online. On Wednesday, we were informed that we would return to America about a week early. A week or so before this, most ending activities were canceled or altered. At the time, I honestly didn’t feel upset; I felt incredibly grateful for all the wonderful experiences I’d had so far and for the time left, however short.

Switching back to online classes was such a weird feeling. Especially when it comes to language classes, I find that meeting in person is more conducive to conversation. No matter if it’s online or in-person, Zeng Laoshi 曾老師 is always so engaging and lively. For our last few classes, I moved a small wooden table to the corner of my room and sat on a towel on the floor. Weird setup, I know. I did this to take advantage of the sunlight coming in from the window. I feel like natural lighting is a bit easier on the eyes and better for the soul.

Luckily, we only had online class for three days. The last day of online classes, we had our final exam, which was rather simple given the whole weird situation. The final exam was two parts: oral and written. The oral exam was three questions, so incredibly brief, and the written exam required us to write a 120-character essay. I ended up writing over 500 characters because I feel like it’s hard to write a full-fledge essay in 120 characters or demonstrate your true language ability.

Since the pandemic situation became a bit more serious, besides my morning run, I pretty much stayed at home for the last few days. I went to a stationary store once to purchase thank you cards, and I also went out a few times with Cindy to buy food. I should mention that all classes in Taiwan switched from in-person to online last Wednesday, so both my host brothers and host sister were home. Cindy helped take care of Cheng-zhen and tried her best to squeeze in a few more meaningful experiences, including buying pineapple cakes to bring back, trying Boba tea for the first time. She’s the sweetest! She gave me so many snacks and patterned masks to bring back.

One delicious dish Cindy wanted me to try was bamboo sprout congee. I fell in love after the first bite. Congee is basically watery rice, but the starch in the rice creates this creamier, thicker texture. Simple additions really elevate congee, such as salt and pepper, green onion, potato, bamboo sprouts, and bits of fried dough. When I get back, I will take it upon myself to try making congee; I’ve made it before, but last time, I didn’t really know what to pair with it, so it tasted pretty bland. I think our local Asian market is going to become my best friend.

Quick random-ish thought: My opinion on Boba tea is that it’s good. I know that might be triggering for Boba lovers, but I just wasn’t overly impressed or disappointed. I don’t think it’s the most amazing drink on the planet, but I think it’s a solid drink; I’d drink it every once and awhile. The Boba tea I tried was made with soymilk and black tea with large brown sugar Boba pearls, little ice, and no sugar added. I think part of the reason why I’m not that big into Boba tea is that it’s pretty much an entire meal in a drink, and I personally prefer to get most of my calories from solid foods with high nutritional content.

Anyway, Sunday morning I normally go to church at the Bilingual Community Church in Kaoshiung, but as with most gatherings and activities, worship was moved online. The wonderful family I met invited me to spend the morning over at their house, so at nine in the morning on Saturday, William picked me up and we spent a good few hours just talking. I also had the opportunity to eat lychee, which is an interesting type of fruit characterized by white flesh and a spiky green-red exterior. In my mind, lychee are kind of like small dragon eggs. They also offered me smoked plums, spicy pickled cabbage, cold sweet potato, and brown sugar infused black tea; honestly so delicious. Lunch was Shanghai Vegetarian Restaurant and spicy, steamed stinky tofu.

Originally, we were going to attend the online service together, but instead, we decided to just talk. We talked about my experience in Taiwan and about NC and about religion. Words cannot describe how grateful I am to have met them. Being able to talk to somebody about how delicious Al’s Burger Shack is while living in a foreign country is awesome. By the way, Al’s Burger Shack is one of the best local restaurants in Chapel Hill that sells homemade burgers, including vegetarian burgers, and some of the best sweet potato fries I’ve ever had.

After I got back, I worked on finishing up packing, writing cards, and preparing for our presentation that evening. The closing ceremony, including our final presentation was set to occur at 7:00 pm that night, but with the change in setting, my heart was not in it. I wanted to share my presentation, but I just didn’t want to do it online; it didn’t feel right. Anyway, for another reason, I ended up not presenting. Right before the presentation, my host family and I had our last meal together. For the past few days, I was holding back a lot of emotions because I don’t like letting my feelings out in the open, but as we talked about me going back and my plans for the summer, I found myself sobbing uncontrollably and in a state where I could not give a presentation without losing control of myself.

I think there are two main reasons why I sobbed my heart out. For one, my period had just begun, which means that I was feeling moodier than usual. Secondly, and this is the main reason, I had this incredibly contradictory feeling: I wanted to go home and see my family in the States, but at the same time, despite the pandemic heating up in Taiwan, I felt so happy and comfortable right where I was. I love my family by blood, and in a matter of a few months, I fell in love with my host family too. I wanted to go home, but I didn’t want to go home because I already felt at home right where I was. I always was not looking forward to the 26 plus hours of travel we had ahead of us.

After getting that all out of my system, leaving Kaohsiung the following day went pretty smoothly. I started the morning with my last run in Taiwan and my last bowl of bamboo shoot congee. Cindy took me out to purchase food for the plane ride back and pineapple shortcake. Around noon, my host mom came home to say goodbye to me, and then my host sister, both my host brothers, my host dad, and Cindy all helped me carry my stuff over to Wenzao. Teary eyed, I said goodbye to Zeng Laoshi and hugged all members of my host family. I suppose a happy ending to this chapter in my life.

After we drove up to Taoyuan, I called my parents to let them know where we were and where we’re heading. When they started talking about Wilson not being there and saying bye to my host family, I let out my last few tears and then called it a day. I don’t think I’ve ever been this emotional before.

I’ve yet to read all the cards I’ve received. I decided to wait until I make it back home and settle in. Honestly, we left Taiwan so quickly it’s hard to feel a sense of closure. There are still a few people who I haven’t said goodbye not because they don’t matter to me but because I just didn’t have enough time. I’m planning on finishing up my goodbyes as soon as I find some wifi. I have a strong feeling that I will be back because I want to go back. Now that I’m back in the states, I’m ready to settle into my life here, but I want to go back. I’ve never felt that strongly before.

Transition Music（音樂）

Please visit haldenlevin.wixsite.com/littledragonjourney to access the transcript of this episode, and know you are always welcome to contact me through my website, email, or social media. Thank you for joining Little Dragon’s Journey. 謝謝你們參加小龍的旅程。拜拜！